Sunday, October 25, 2009

poem to my mother

from you i learn
what it is to love
wholly
completely
unconditionally
the way you love
me, us, and even
the outsider in need

from you i learn to accept
children
as they are
for you believe
the baggage they carry
they got it from the adults
and you take them in
faults, problems and all

from you I learn to believe
that even when the worst days hit me
the good days will balance up
the pain, the tears
with joys and smiles

from you i learn to be gentle
for life is sometimes hard enough
and a gentle touch
that shows care, concern
is much more useful
and needed

from you i learn to be humble
because there is no place
for pride that hurt
and ego that attack
and that i am no less a person
for the humility that i display

from you i learn to be proud
for there is no shame in poverty
that i can still hold my head up high
and reach for the stars
and dream the impossible dream

from you i learn to be responsible
that duty is sometimes not a choice
and that having taken up that responsibility
i see it through
no matter what the price
because you took responsibility for me
i never had to suffer the irresponsibility of others

from you I learn to live
as rightly as i strive to give
of myself
to want but not deprive others
to share but not give up all i have
to contribute because this life
is not just about me
but about life and living
all these and more
from you
i learn

Saturday, October 17, 2009

there is a death today

there is a death today
a funeral to attend
not anyone i know
not really
not anyone i've met
not personally

there is a death today
a life has ended
the family mourned
i think
the adults at least
not really

a life has ended
the drama has not
the past lingers
in present
anger
hurt
bitterness
blame

the dead lies
awaiting
his journey
to conclude
the last farewell
an act
of togetherness
a show of family
tears and cries
horns and drums
to play out
to an audience
the slow last parade
of dead and mourners
even as the credit falls

there is a death today
a funeral to attend
not anyone i know
not really
not anyone i've met
not personally

today

today
is a day
tomorrow
it will be
yesterday
soon
it will be
one day
some time ago
erm...that day
remember when
but today
is a day
i spent with you
and that makes
today
count
it makes
the one days
the some time agos
the erm...that days
the remember whens
not just any day
but a day
I spent
with you
today is
just one day
tomorrow it will be
yesterday

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

to be so loved

to be so loved
is but a small compensation
for the love
you showered me
unsurpassed
many many folds
unmatched
undemanded
your soulful eyes
never clouded
clear as you look
radiating kindness
devotion
a love
undiluted
uncompromised
your touch
ever so gentle
you connect
you communicate
softly
affectionately
meaningfully
your selfless gift to me
a treasure
i cherish
a keepsake
with utmost gratitude
i hold close to my heart
knowing full well
never able to return
equal to
the love i received
thus far
only able to utter
to you
to be so loved
is but a small compensation
for the love
you showered me.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

I am not done crying

i am not done crying
but i am not rushing it either
how quickly i take for granted
the joys i had
how quickly reality knocks me
on my head
and DEATH stares coldly
at my face
eyeball to eyeball
choking the gasp
escaping my throat
unlocking the wells
of tears flowing freely
uncontrollably
unashamedly
publicly
lost
defeated
all strength ebbed
drained
dreams of a time
spent at leisure
fast forwarded
the future now sooner
DEATH
his calling card
a somber reminder
that LIFE
is an eggshell
falling off the edge
catch it
live it
i
can
still
enjoy
a treasured LIFE
measured in days
in moments
in memories
etched and digitized
even as i breathe
i am not done crying
but i'm not rushing it either

Saturday, October 10, 2009

the door is not yet closed

the door is not yet closed
is your journey complete
questions
many questions
haunt me
taunt me
for answers
I don't have
scenes play out
over and over
again and again
what was
what could have been
what ifs
guilt
anger
repeat
as if
in repetition
my broken dreams
my shattered heart
restored

i'm torn
shredded
desperate
to silence
the screaming heart
to fill that bottomless void
searching
looking
wondering
is your journey complete
my door is not yet closed.